Tuesday, March 24, 2009

"Call the Fire Department, this one's out of control"

First and foremost, I would like to thank our loyal reader Marc, from Hoboken, NJ, for designing the Shampoo Effect's new look. His mastery of binary code speaks for itself. Now while I am appreciative for what he has done, I must take this chance to condemn him for an entirely different matter. Marc is a contributing writer for a blog that I have linked to on the right hand side, and from what my sources tell me, it was at his urging that this blog (EBC) succumbed to the latest media craze and joined Twitter.

About a month ago a friend suggested that I join Twitter. She said that it was definitely something that someone with my scope of the media and politics should look into. At this point I didn't know too much about Twitter. For those of you that don't know, it is basically a website that is devoted to Facebook status updates. You have 140 characters (that number could be off) to answer the question, what are you doing? Much of the hype is based on being able to follow "tweets" (postings on Twitter) of celebrities. Now I didn't want to write this new fad off right away because based on my track record (AOL, Napster, Facebook, iTunes, Gmail, Blogger) I have fallen for each new trend as they have become mainstream. I instead waited for the man who shapes most of my opinions to decide for me.

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Claire McCaskill's Twittering
comedycentral.com
Colbert Report Full EpisodesPolitical HumorMark Sanford


Twitter had infiltrated my friends, politics, and I guess I should have known that it was only a matter of time before it ransacked the world of sports. Milwaukee Bucks forward Charlie Villanueva infamously "tweeted" during halftime of a game against the Celtics on March 15th. The halftime "tweet" didn't seem to hamper Villanueva's performance as he scored 11 of his 19 points in the 4th quarter to lead the Bucks to victory. Upon hearing this news, Bucks head coach Scott Skiles, a hot head by nature, gracefully banned "tweeting" from the lockerroom, saying that anything that remotely gives the impression that his players aren't fully committed to winning will not be allowed. Of course the media ran wild with the story, which I'm sure wasn't Villanueva's intention because he's not the brightest (he went to UCONN for a few years and I'm sure he went to all of his classes). This "tweet" heard round the country gave Villanueva more media attention than anything he ever did on the court. It even prompted PTI's Michael Wilbon to say that "Twitter is one of the worst things to happen to the United States of America."

The "tweeting" did not stop there. On Saturday, Suns center Shaquille O'Neal "twote" (is that the past tense of tweet?)"Attention all twitterers I'm a tweet at halftime and not get fined like vill a new wave a whteva his name is." He then went on to "tweet" "Shhhhhhh" shortly before the start of the third quarter. When asked, Suns head coach Alvin Gentry said, "As long as he gets 25 [points] and 11 [rebounds], he can do whatever he wants. He can Twitter, Facebook, MySpace."

This Twitter craze is getting out of control. Last week a court case seemingly cost a building materials company $12.6 million, but the verdict was appealed on the grounds of a juror "tweeting" during the case.

It looks like Twitter is here to stay, at least until a new fad comes along. It is in the news more than A-Rod, but it's just not for me. I mean who wants to read that I'm on the toilet for the 3rd time in one day?
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Tuesday, March 17, 2009

In case you missed it

Presumably most of you have seen/heard about this Jon Stewart/Jim Cramer media altercation. In case you haven't, here are the videos. It all started back on March 4th when CNBC TV personality Rick Santelli backed out on his scheduled appearance on the Daily Show at the last minute.

Shortly after it aired, this video created a stir among the politically inclined public. Apparently the only CNBC personality that reacted was Mad Money host Jim Cramer. Cramer was upset about the claim that The Daily Show made in its CNBC montage. In this next video Stewart admits that Cramer's complaint is technically correct, but rips him to shreds in the process.

After Stewart personally attacked Cramer, Cramer's parent company NBC (technically GE) had him appear on many of their programs to show their support. Stewart played off of this by pretending that his parent company, Viacom, did the same for him.

In this next video, Stewart responds to the media's portrayal of his back and forth with Cramer and announces that Cramer will appear on his show.

Of course, my homeboy Stephen Colbert, formerly of The Daily Show, wanted to get in on the fun.

Here is the intro for the show in which Cramer appeared. It might be better than the interview itself.

After all the hype, here is part 1 of 3 of the interview

I don't know why part one of such an anticipated event would only last one minute and thirty-eight seconds. But let's be honest, it happens. Here is part 2 of 3.

And finally, part 3 of 3. Big ups to anyone that's actually made it this far and is still interested.

This entire situation is very reminiscent of Syracuse University's recent run in the Big East tournament. They, like the videos, started off great, but by the end they ran out of gas while still having their moments.
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Monday, March 9, 2009

Sir Charles

Charles Barkley is an American hero. His entertainment career has been remarkable, but like most Americans, he has had a few problems along the way. For example, he is currently serving a 3 day jail sentence for a DUI arrest on New Year's Eve.

During his NBA playing career he averaged 22.1 points and 11.7 rebounds per game. Barkley earned the nickname "The Round Mound of Rebound" because of his ability to control the glass despite his relatively pudgy 6'5 frame. His talents were such that in 1996 he was named as one of the NBA's 50 greatest players.


Great song by Patty Smyth

While Barkley excelled on the court, it has been his off court antics that have catapulted him into the national spotlight over the past 20 years. In 1993, he was at the center of attention for his refusal to be considered a role model. This stance went against the grain of the times. America was amid the "family values" message that was championed by former VP Dan Quayle, but Barkley, always politically inclined, was quick to rebuff this assumption that he should be looked up to by kids simply because he was a great basketball player. He had this to say,

"A million guys can dunk a basketball in jail. Should they be role models?"

His message also involved realistic expectations.

"I think the media demands that athletes be role models because there's some jealousy involved. It's as if they say, this is a young black kid playing a game for a living and making all this money, so we're going to make it tough on him. And what they're really doing is telling kids to look up to someone they can't become, because not many people can be like we are. Kids can't be like Michael Jordan"

Barkley even went as far as to write the text for this commercial.



In 1991, Sir Charles was fined for spitting on a female fan after a game. He claimed that he was attempting to spit on a male heckler, but that he didn't "get enough foam" and missed his mark. This just added fuel to the fire in terms of Barkley's persona as a hot head. His physical and emotional style led to many on court altercations and technical fouls. About all of this he said, "I don't create controversies. They're there long before I open my mouth. I just bring them to your attention."

In addition to this recent DUI arrest, Barkley has been arrested for breaking a man's nose in a fight, again for throwing a man through a plate glass window, and has been known to gamble compulsively. While his decision making has sometimes been questionable, he has always taken responsibility for his mistakes. This is, if nothing else, admirable. Notice how he takes 100% of the blame. It's rare that an athlete does that.




Barkley has been a staple of the Emmy award winning TNT broadcasts of the NBA since 2000. Ernie Johnson and Kenny "The Jet" Smith join him on the set to provide the only halftime and post game shows that I look forward to watching. Sometimes it's better than the game itself.









Barkley has even become a target of the famous impersonator Frank Caliendo.



In 2002 he released his first book I May Be Wrong, But I Doubt It. In 2005, he came out with Who's Afraid of A Large Black Man? To answer that, everyone. Barkley has also been a fixture on T-Mobile Fav 5 commercials with Dwayne Wade for the past few years.

Barkley is also notorious for his horrid golf swing.



Tiger even took a crack at Barkley's swing.



His swing is so bad that he is now seeking help from the world's number one swing coach Hank Haney as part of a Golf Channel reality show called The Haney Project.



Barkley is simply the man. He was a prominent figure during my childhood and continues to be someone I enjoy. When I was little I had a Barkley Dream Team sticker on my bedroom wall. Also, when I was learning how to play basketball on my neighbor's 6 foot hoop, my friend's Dad, who was late 30s early 40s at the time, would get the ball in the post, hold it in one hand, smack it with the other, yell "BARKLEY", and then dunk.
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Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Great Feats in (Hockey?) Broadcasting

There's no denying that hockey is irrelevant. For example, I'd be hard pressed to find five people that knew that today was the NHL's trade deadline. Granted, I also might be hard pressed to find five people that read this blog on a consistent basis. As far from the public's consciousness as hockey is, one man is doing his best to bring it back. Randy Moller, the radio play-by-play voice of the Florida Panthers has infused his goal calls with pop culture lines in an attempt to broaden his audience. While I applaud his efforts, I also realize that trying to get people in the state of Florida to care about hockey is next to impossible. I'm convinced that 60% of the Tampa Bay/St. Petersburg population is oblivious to the fact that the Lightning won Lord Stanley's Cup in 2004. My job requires me to listen to a host of play-by-play announcers every night and I can assure you that no one, outside of Gus Johnson, come close to being as eccentric or real world savvy as Moller.



While the video does a good job of indicating his references. Let's go a little bit more in depth.

Call #1 "LA face with an Oakland booty."- From Sir-Mix-a-Lot's (1993) Grammy winning hit "Baby Got Back"


(From the 1:23 to 1:38 mark)

Call #2 "Ma, the meatloaf!"- from Wedding Crashers (2005)



Call #3 "Make me a bicycle clown!"- also from Wedding Crashers (2005)



Call #4 "You did the motorboat, didn't you?"- Moller completes the Wedding Crashers (2005) trifecta with this one.



Call #5 "Oh, good for you"- from American Psycho (2000).

Blank

Call #6 "Pay that man his money"-said by John Malkovich in his greatest role ever, as Teddy KGB in Rounders (1998).



Call #7 "Pour Some Sugar on Me"- The British rock band Def Leppard's signature song, off of their 1987 album Hysteria. It is still one of the top bar songs in America today. Also, true of false, I bought Def Leppard's greatest hits album a few weeks ago?



Call #8 "There's a new sheriff in town and his name is Reggie Hammond"- from the movie 48 Hrs. (1982), featuring Nick Nolte and Eddie Murphy, as Reggie Hammond.

Blank

Call #9 "Run Forest, Run"- from the Academy Award winning film Forrest Gump (1994).

Call #10 "She Blinded Me with Science"- the title of British singer Thomas Dolby's 1982 song.



Call #11 "Wocka Wocka"- it's the catch phrase of the muppet Fozzie Bear



Call #12 "We've landed on the moon!"- said by Jim Carey's character Lloyd Christmas in Dumb and Dumber (1994)



Call #13 "What's in the box?"- from the movie Se7en (1995) featuring Brad Pitt, Morgan Freeman, and Kevin Spacey.



Call #14 "Who's your daddy and what does he do?"- from Kindergarten Cop (1990), starring the current Governor of California. This video has some a bunch of vintage Schwarzenegger lines. This particular line occurs from the 3:06 to 3:09 mark.



Call #15 "You're my boy blue"- This line was famously uttered by Will Ferrel's character Frank Ricard in Old School (2003). This video was surprisingly hard to find. My apologies for the poor quality.


1:05 to 1:06 mark

Call #16 "Skyrockets in flight. Afternoon delight"- made famous in Anchorman (2004).




Call #17 "We're gonna need a bigger boat"- from Steven Spielberg's classic thriller Jaws (1975)



Call #18 "I'm never gonna dance again"- is a song by George Michael.




Call #19 "Come with me if you wan't to live" (0:20 to 0:23 second mark)- another famous Schwarzenegger line. This one is from Terminator 2 (1991).

Call #20 "Get off my lawn"- from the Clint Eastwood film Gran Torino (2008).


(1:14 to 1:18 mark)

Call #21 "And I draw ding dongs on people"- I wouldn't classify this one as coming from the world of pop culture. This is just something that Moller heard a local comedian say on the radio while impersonating Tracy Morgan.

Call #22 "I go to work like a doctor"- is a rap song from 1989 by the artist Kool Moe Dee



And finally

Call #23 "I'm a lead farmer"- was said by Robert Downey Jr.'s character Kirk Lazarus in Tropic Thunder (2008), a role that he earned him an Academy Award nomination for Best Performance by an actor in a supporting role.













Thanks to Justin in Levittown, NY for the link.
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My Man

ESPN.com writer Bill Simmons once wrote, "The best part of my year is when I get an email from one of my best friends with the subject line, Vegas?"Dare I say that I just had a similar feeling after checking my inbox and seeing an email from one of my best friends with the subject line, 'DENZEL WASHINGTON'? While the contents of the email were not nearly as cool as a trip to Vegas, they are still blog worthy. Basically anything involving Denzel is.



Apparently Denzel and his family recently paid a visit to an army hospital (the Brook Army Medical Center (BAMC)) in San Antonio. The hospital is for recovering American soldiers. Most of the inhabitants are burn victims. On the grounds of the hospital are what are known as Fisher Houses, which are for the families of the injured soldiers to stay during the recuperation process. The hospital charges only a minimal fee for the families to stay in these houses, but the demand for them severely outweighs the number of them that are available.



After touring one of these houses, Denzel, according to this email that has been forwarded a number of times, asked how much it would cost to build one. Once he was given a price he took out his checkbook and wrote a check to the hospital for that very amount right then and there.



Now the creator of the original email (evidently someone in the military) wants to know why this story did not get picked up by the national media. Now he/or she is all hot and bothered that Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Tom Cruise, etc. get all this attention for their efforts abroad and Denzel's actions go unnoticed. Personally I think it's great that Denzel's efforts didn't attract any media coverage. It shows that he doesn't care about being noticed for his actions of good will.


This one looks like it's right out of a movie

Sure, other celebrities (and many athletes) show their support for our troops/help out around the community for selfish reasons. They probably show up for 10 minutes, take a few pictures and bask in the positive press. Now I love the NBA, but I question how many of its players can read, let alone read to kids. All in all, this story just reaffirms my view of Denzel as a true American hero, on and off the silver screen.

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Faux and Balanced

If you don't occasionally read The Onion, you should. They create mock news stories that mirror real events. These sarcastic articles bluntly say what the news stories actually mean. For example, here is an article about A-Rod.

Here's a few other samples of what The Onion provides.





How celebrity couples spent Valentine's Day.

The CIA has mistakenly ruined hundreds of top secret documents.

This article pokes fun at why people get dogs.




I've also now added The Onion, and a few other sites, to the link list on the right hand side of this blog.
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Monday, March 2, 2009

Let's talk about...

It's not just this blizzard that has the weather on the minds of many in the northeast. It's literally an everyday thing. Adults that are forced into conversation immediately revert to the weather no matter what. Either it's "such a beautiful day", "it's freezing out", or it's "really coming down out there". Somehow weather has become the ultimate buffer zone in conversational tactics and I think that we can do better.

I mean, I get it. People naturally gravitate to the weather because its a common bond. Everyone experiences the weather and therefore it's relevant material to use in conversation. It also changes enough as to not become that stale of a topic. I've just gotten sick of it. We have so many other commonalities to chose from. Why did we settle on weather? I think last night was the tipping point for me. At about 5 p.m., people at work were talking to upper management about being put up in hotel rooms that night, even though at the time, it wasn't snowing. Then, when I was leaving at around 8 p.m. I said "Have a good night" to a security guard who responded by saying "Be careful out there." Again, at this point, it was not snowing at all. Well sure enough I woke up this morning and there was finally a sheet of white on the ground. This just means that everyone in the great state of Connecticut will automatically turn into a 78-year-old woman behind the wheel.

The weather is such a part of our daily lives that we've glorified the men that predict it. Some how this man became a celebrity? Sure, some guys handle the green screen better than others, but why do we care? It's not like people use their terminology. As bland as talking about the weather is, the manner in which it is talked about is worse; however this actually might be a good thing. I don't want anyone asking me if I saw the quadruple doppler sonar percentage index. Either way, this whole weather talk has gone too far. Can't we think of something else to talk about? Let's explore some other commonalities and figure out if they'll work.

Politics? Nope, too polarizing. The government is something that we all have in common, but it's too risky of a topic to bring up in conversation with someone you barely know because they might have differing views. Some people just find politics to be too personal.



On this note, the media clearly shapes the way that people think about politics. Most of Americans disapproved of George W. Bush, but I highly doubt that many could provide a solid reason for their disapproval. Similarly, people think that Obama is the cure for all that is wrong with our country.

Sports? The world of sports gives us a break from talking about the weather at the water cooler/in the elevator a few times a year, but not enough people follow sports closely enough for it to become a daily conversational topic. Plenty of people just don't care enough about sports and those they do often don't have the time to follow them as closely as they would like to. What games are popular enough to talk about with a relative stranger? I would argue only the superbowl and possibly the NCAA men's basketball tournament. Although baseball diehards still claim that it's America's pastime (it's not), no one worth talking to will watch the conclusion of a World Series game when the first pitch is thrown at 10:37 p.m.

Poop? Unfortunately society has attached a stigma to this natural bodily function that we all experience. I've read a book about poop and had a few (daily) conversations with people about it and I have learned so much. Just think of all the things that people could learn (wiping style, etc) from each other when it comes to bathroom experience. To me it seems like a great conversational topic, but maybe that's because I poop like clockwork when I wake up every morning. It's more than a routine. It's part of waking up. Once my feet hit the ground I'm headed to the dish. It's really too bad that there are so many 'shameful shitters' out there.

Movies? In this day and age movies have almost lost their luster. I can't remember a time in the past few years (outside of seeing The Dark Knight at midnight) where I was in a theater that was packed. This is a problem because daily conversational topics have to be current. Therefore the only movies that could be discussed are those recently/or currently in theaters. This severely limits the potential of this topic because of people's reliance on Blockbuster/Netflix and On Demand. People just don't go to the movies like they used to. In fact, I know a girl that hasn't seen a movie in theaters since Blade (1998), which featured Wesley Snipes.

Food? I actually think this one could work. Think about it. Everyone eats. Why not ask people that you come across what they had for breakfast or lunch? Then after they answer you can ask how whatever they ate was and continue from there. Speaking of food, I'm currently on a quest to acquire as many simple recipes as I can to broaden my diet. Chef Boyardee Ravioli, Cheez-its, and Mountain Dew just aren't cutting it anymore.




Keep your ears peeled for weather-related conversations and you'll notice how out of control it is in no time.
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