Stop Me If You've...

A week and a half ago I encountered what I thought was an uncomfortable social situation. I didn't like how I handled it, so I turned to my buddy Browny to assess the scenario. Our email exchange went as follows...

Sir,
 

First and foremost, congratulations on your wedding. It was an amazing weekend. You and Katie are awesome. How was Port St. Lucia?

 

I have a social etiquette question for you...

 

Friday morning I'm well into a run at about 9am when I hear a car beep at me. Instinctively, I turn and look at the car that's going the same direction that I am and I don't recognize the vehicle or the two middle aged women in it. The woman in the passenger seat has her window down and motions towards me. I stop, take off my headphones, and look her way. She asks if I know where _________ Street is. I don't and tell her that as I put my headphones back on and continue my run. The same car then stops 40 feet later and asks a man who was watering his lawn.

Is it within the bounds of proper protocal to stop someone that's wearing headphones and running to ask for directions? I get the assumption that if someone is running they're probably familiar with the area, but isn't asking them to stop a major inconvenience? Someone walking or out in their front lawn makes sense (I wouldn't stop someone mowing their lawn, though). By the way, in today's smartphone world, who stops anyone for directions anymore?

Would love your thoughts,

Noon


Hello Sir,

St. Lucia was wonderful and if I didn't live in the greatest city in the world it would have been very hard to leave.

In regards to your social etiquette question I must say that this a topic that is very prevalent in my home life. Not because I am a runner but the wife is an avid runner. She will never stop a run to address someone in a car or walking by. Even if she knows the person she may quickly yell "hello, sorry I am training and can't stop."

Mowing the lawn is my business and I hate when neighbors see me out mowing and decide to come over and chat me up. It's hard enough to get it going the first time and even worse to stop it and do it a second time after our pointless conversation.

I understand people's desperation to figure out where they are going especially if they are running late but it is not acceptable to interrupt people while they are doing there own work and especially people who are running. I would never expect someone who is running to just put their workout on hold to give me directions. That is unacceptable on that women's part. Like you said, get a GPS.


Obviously the two of us are on the same page, so case closed. That said, when is it socially acceptable to ask someone for directions? Rarely because people should just use their smartphones, but here are three categories for those without the internet at their fingertips.

You can ask the following people without any hesitation: a gas station attendant, a crossing guard, Siri, a person (or couple) walking, someone in the car next to you with their window down, the mailman, or a police officer.

It's a little dicier to ask the next group, but I'd allow it: someone watering flowers or otherwise gardening, someone raking leaves or shoveling snow, someone in the car next to you with their window up, someone walking with a stroller, a toll booth collector (depending on the length and speed of the line), or a construction worker.

You should not ask people in this last group: runners, bicyclists, people mowing their lawn, or children.

Let the record show that on my run yesterday a man in a car yelled "Hey!" to me and motioned for me to come towards him (presumably to ask for directions) and my initial instinct was to stop, but, with the previous email exchange in mind, I made a hand gesture (not the finger) and kept on going.