The three chicks I'd marry tomorrow

How many times have you been watching a movie and just completely fallen for one of the characters? Please don't act like you are free from this affliction. Female movie characters are so idealized because in more cases than not, only the best aspects of their personalities are portrayed. Most of us guys know that deep down, every woman has a crazy, psychotic bitch in them that usually comes out (well aside from the obvious once a month) right before a big trip, whenever cleaning is involved, and when you least expect it. The female movie characters that we fall in love with are not real because, well for starters, they are all gorgeous Hollywood celebrities. Women this attractive and this cool cease to exist in the real world, but somehow, because of how they are presented in movies, we still have hope that they do.

Which brings us to the top 3 female movie characters that I have fallen head over heels for. No real surprise here, but two of them are from bonafide chick flicks.

1.) Andie Anderson (played by Kate Hudson) in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days (2003)



I mean, if that dress doesn't say it all, then I don't know what does. Normally guys aren't overly impressed by a dress because if a girl is good looking then she's usually going to look good in a dress. The first time I saw this movie (yes that implies that I've seen it more than once) I was completely blown away. Andie Anderson is the total package, which of course means that she could get my entire package all day every day. Obviously I dig that she's a writer, goes to Knick's games, and did I mention that she's a smokeshow? She's so hot that she does all of these annoying things throughout the movie and it doesn't even matter. She's so hot that she made a guy's name hot.

I do have one gripe, but it's not with Andie, or the movie for that matter. It's just that in the movie they sing their own version of the song "You're So Vain" by Carly Simon. Now the lyrics, "You're so vain. You probably think this song is about you. Don't you? You're so vain," are repeated throughout the song. Everytime I hear the song, I want to say- Hey Carly, by addressing this unnamed man as 'You', you have made the song about him, yet somehow you are calling him vain for thinking (accurately mind you) that... it is about him.

2.) Claire Cleary (played by Rachel McAdams) in Wedding Crashers (2005)



Now this movie is most known for its humor and everytime I watch it I pick up on yet another line that your average college aged kid uses in regular conversation. It's literally a gold mine. While the humor was the initial draw, everytime that I have seen it since, I have been all about the love. It's sweet, sappy, and corny (ironically all words I could use to describe poop), but this scene gets me every time.



Claire is literally everything a guy could want. She's quick on her feet, funny, pretty (phenomenal smile), smart, has Christopher Walken as her father, and loves to play the slaps game. Girls, please take notice that she is rather pale- yet still widely adored. You don't have to tan 8 times a week to impress men.

3.) April Hoffman (played by Isla Fisher) in Definitely, Maybe (2008)



Yes, she's the girl that Vince Vaughn marries in Wedding Crashers, but in this movie she plays one of Ryan Reynolds' love interests. Because I'll assume that most of you haven't seen it, here's the trailer (no way I would ever embed that) . I saw it with my sisters on Thanksgiving. It has chick flick written all over it. It even has a textbook chick flick title. It fits in perfectly with Love Actually, Serendipity, and P.S. I Love You. But in my defense, everything is closed on Thanksgiving and I think Ryan Reynolds is hysterical. Speaking of Ryan Reynolds, here is a bonus chick from a movie that I'm in love with. Tara Reid in Van Wilder.



Okay, so now that my heterosexuality is semi-restored, back to April. She's a smoking hot red head that plays a girl that pretends to be bad ass, but deep down is a complete softy. I think I might actually be more into the actress herself because in every movie I have seen she has spoken without her natural voice. She was raised in Australia and has an English accent and pretty much any accent is hot.

If I had to pick one of the three, I think I'd have to go with Claire (McAdams).



I don't know what's going on with me lately. I'm writing about Ben Affleck and chick flicks. Somebody better send me an article about red meat and beer pronto.