My Starting Five

Last week someone asked me who’s in my starting five. They weren’t talking about my fantasy basketball team or the terrible Sprint advertising campaign featuring Charles Barkley and Dwyane Wade. What they meant was one of those agreements amongst married couples where each spouse picks 5 celebrities that they can sleep with without any repercussions. Essentially they wanted me to name the five celebrities that I want to sleep with the most. For fear of wasting one of my selections I chose not to answer. It’s almost like a genie in a bottle situation. You don’t want to make any of your wishes impulsively. Everything has to be well thought out. So that’s what I did. After mulling the question over for the past week here’s what I’ve come up with.

1.) Olivia Wilde



I was way late to the party on this one, but I’m a huge fan. She might have the most attractive eyes on the planet. Throw in the fact that she’s an Irish-American, real cool in interviews, and gets topless in movies and this one was a no brainer. Jason Sudekis is a very lucky man.

2.) Marisa Miller



I don’t think it’s possible for me to be more attracted to another human being. The former SI Swimsuit Cover Model is a bit of a surfer chick, but she loves sports (always played in those celebrity softball games at the All-Star Break) and has the ideal body.

3.) Candice Swanepoel



Her body defies the laws of physics and I desperately want to get an up close and personal look. You know the term “baby bearing hips”? She has the complete opposite, but she also has legs for days.

4.) Mila Kunis



She’s a very popular pick right now and she makes my list because she’s got that dark, mysterious quality to her. She also has the kind of eyes that suck you in.

5.) Nicole Sherzinger



She’s not black, but she certainly diversifies my list and then some. The lead Pussycat Doll doesn’t get enough credit for being such a knockout.


And now my Week 6 NFL picks

at Titans +6.5 vs. Steelers- The quality of the Thursday night games has been abysmal. I love how there’s a game every week and I’m more engaged with the NFL product (I would normally never watch the Titans, or Cardinals/Rams from last week), but the players clearly aren’t prepared physically or mentally for these quick turnarounds. I’ll take the home dog and hope it’s an ugly affair.

Bengals -2.5 at Browns- I don’t feel good about this one, but I still think that the Bengals are the better team, even though you’re supposed to assume that home field is worth 3 points (that would make the Browns a ½ point favorite on a neutral field).

at Jets -3.5 vs. Colts- The Jets showed a lot of fight against the Texans on Monday and this game seems like a turning point in the season for them. If they lose they might go off the rails and the Tebow talk will intensify, but I think they put together a complete game and take care of the Colts.

Chiefs +4 at Bucs- My cousin who will not be named once started a Facebook Group (back when people did that) called, “I want to have Brady Quinn’s children.”

Raiders +9.5 at Falcons- Atlanta wins, but Oakland covers, right?

Cowboys +3.5 at Ravens- The Cowboys are coming off of a bye and Tony Romo isn’t going to throw 5 interceptions again. I like the pokes (look it up) to win outright.

Lions +3.5 at Eagles- Matthew Stafford might be more due than A-Rod right now.

at Dolphins -4 vs. Rams- I can’t get a read on the Dolphins. After watching HardKnocks I thought they were going to be horrendous, but they’ve either overachieved mightily or they’re a lot better than I thought. I’ll assume it’s the latter and lay the points.

at Seahawks +3.5 vs. Patriots- Seattle has beaten the Cowboys and Packers at home this year, so I feel pretty good about them staying within a field goal.

at Cardinals -4.5 vs. Bills- No way I could turn down the opportunity to lay 4.5 points with a three headed running attack like the one the Cardinals have in Larod Stephens-Howling, Alfonso Smith, and William Powell.

at Redskins -1 vs. Vikings- RGIII plays and the Redskins squeak past the very solid Vikings.

Giants +6.5 at 49ers- The defending Super Bowl Champs are getting 6.5 points on the road (where they not only play better, but in a place where they won the NFC Championship Game last year)? Yes, please.

Packers +3.5 at Texans- The Packers need this game and I think Houston could benefit from a loss. That isn’t to say that Gary Kubiak is going to coach to lose, but they don’t want to deal with all of the undefeated bull shit that the Packers did last year. The Packers are desperate and win out right. at

Chargers +1 vs. Broncos- It’s a coin flip game and both teams need it. I’ll take the home team.

Last Week- 4-10
Season- 33-41-3