Double Take

I realize that it is officially football season and trust me I'm about as gun ho about it as anyone that you know, but I would be remiss if I didn't mention the extraordinary year that Jose Bautista is having for my beloved Toronto Blue Jays.

Entering tonight's game against the Baltimore Orioles Bautista is batting .262 with a major league leading 46 homeruns and he's also second in the American League with 110 runs batted in. The 29-yea-old's career year has seemingly come out of nowhere as his previous season high for home runs was 16.

After the Pittsburgh Pirates sent him down to their AAA team in August of 2008 he was traded to the Blue Jays for a player to be named later. In case the enormity of that statement passed you by, let me place the appropriate amount of emphasis on it. The worst team in Major League Baseball, the Pirates, decided that this guy wasn't good enough to be on their major league roster, so they sent him to the minors. Perhaps the the brass of the Toronto Blue Jays saw something that no one else did because when he was acquired I thought he was nothing more than a utility player. With his versatility (he can play third base and the outfield) I figured that he would just spell Scott Rolen, Alex Rios, etc. Well sure enough the 2009 season didn't go according to plan for the Blue Jays and Rolen was dealt at the deadline and Rios was claimed off of waivers by the White Sox. This opened the door for Bautista to play everyday in September and boy did he make the most of it. He hit 10 home runs in the month and built some serious momentum going into this season.

Now part of the reason why Bautista is quickly becoming my favorite player is because he looks exactly like my former housemate Pete.



The similarities don't stop there. Believe it or not Pete was a standout baseball player back in college. In fact, much like Bautista, he had a breakout year that seemingly came out of nowhere. In his sophomore season (2006) Pete hit just .238 and led the team in strikeouts. The kid couldn't lay off those sliders in the dirt. The following year he was an entirely different player. Now I can't find the final boxscore for the Stags 2007 campaign anywhere online, but as of this article written about him (by yours truly) on April 30th of 2007 he was leading the team with a .377 batting average, 16 doubles, and 5 home runs.

Pete's 2007 season earned him all sorts of accolades. He was named First Team All-MAAC, played in an All-Star Game in Fenway Park, and was named to the 2008 Brooks Wallace Watch List.

So naturally I pointed out this striking similarity to Pete back when the Blue Jays first acquired Bautista. At first I'm not sure that Pete had ever heard of Bautista, but he's an avid baseball fan so he eventually saw him play the Yankees, his favorite team, and he saw the resemblance. I have a lot of friends that like sports, but at that point in time no one else that I knew (and who knew Pete) would have known who Jose Bautista was, so I don't think I mentioned this doppelganger situation to anyone else.

So throughout the course of this season whenever I'd be at work watching a Blue Jay game and Bautista would homer I would text Pete and let him know what a great job he was doing, or that his twin brother hit another homerun, etc. Now that Bautista leads the bigs in home runs he's become something of a household name (at least to those of us who play fantasy baseball), so more and more people that know Pete have noticed the resemblance.



Another similarity between Pete and Bautista is that they are both masters of "the pimp job". I'm not sure what, if anything, the term has to do with actual pimps, but what it refers to is the arrogant extended stare after hitting a homerun, or the cocky bat flip afterwards. Jose has obviously hit and pimped a lot more homeruns than Pete, but Pete pimped lazy flyballs like there was no tomorrow.

Hope Springs Eternal

Today is both opening day in baseball and the national championship in college basketball. Oh and by the way, Tiger Woods is fielding questions from the media at The Masters. Can a single day in sports be greater than today? Seriously, as a sports enthusiast, I have a full blown hard on (and thankfully I don't have to work until tonight). Now obviously opening day and the national championship don't always coincide (right?), but it got me thinking nonetheless. What is the best day of the year to be a sports fan? Of course, a lot of this has to do with personal preference, but I'll run through some of the top options. If I forget a big one feel free to call me out on it. We'll start with what I consider to be the best....

Opening Day in baseball- Football has definitely taken over as America's number one sport, but I still think that opening day is the best day to be a sports fan. Baseball fans all across the country are optimistic about their team's chances for success in the upcoming season and let me tell you that you don't find that kind of optimism that often. I think a lot of this has to do with the fact that the season sort of sneaks up on us. We know that Spring Training is going on, but we don't really pay attention to it. In football, on the other hand, there is so much attention paid to the pre-season that we sort of know which teams are going to do well and which teams don't have a chance at making the playoffs. In baseball, every team thinks they have a shot (except the Bluejays this year). The perfect example is the Tampa Bay Rays of 2007. Everyone picked them to finish 5th in the AL East, but they won the division and went to the World Series.

The Superbowl- The Superbowl has almost become more of an event than a football game. It's still a great day, don't get me wrong, but most fans don't have a dog in the fight and a large portion are more interested in the commercials than the actual game.

The BCS National Championship- I watch it every year, but I usually don't care who wins because my teams (Notre Dame/Syracuse) aren't in it. I actually think that New Year's Day is a better day for college football even though the games don't mean anything, whereas the BCS National Championship game does.

The Kentucky Derby- The most exciting two minutes in sports is very cool and I watch it every year to see which South American jockey Max's dad has gambled on and because it's easily accessible. What I mean by that is that you get all the information you need to know in the pre-race show and then you get the immediate pay off with the race. This makes for exciting television, but it's not really an event that consumes a sports fan's day. I mean, I usually don't even realize that it's the day of the Kentucky Derby until an hour or two before the race.

Selection Sunday- Hopefully this day doesn't get ruined by expanding the field to 96 teams, but Selection Sunday is awesome. There's drama (who gets in, who gets left out), intrigue (which other team's are in your team's bracket), analysis (who do the experts like), and participation by the fan (filling out your bracket). Also you have the ACC, Big Ten, and Big 12 championship games earlier in the day.

When it comes to college basketball, I think this is the best single day of the year. Of course the first weekend of the NCAA tournament is better, but that's a four day stretch. The national championship is great too, but I rarely care about the outcome. That being said, let's go Butler (If you can't beat them, join them).

The (first day of the) NFL Draft- In case you weren't aware, this is now a Thursday night primetime event, so it's hard for me to evaluate. In the past, the first day of the draft was a Saturday and it lasted for a solid 7 hours. I used to write down the team name, the draft pick, the draft pick's position, and where the draft pick went to college for all of the first round picks. I would literally watch the entire first round non stop for 4 hours. Now this is without a doubt a great sports day and it has received more and more attention as the NFL has ascended to the top of the list in terms of popularity among sports, but it is too long to be considered as the best day of the year as a sports fan.

The NBA Draft- Better than the NFL Draft in the sense that it's always been a Thursday night primetime event and that it moves much quicker. The problem with the NBA Draft is that (well first of all not enough people like/follow the NBA) outside of the top 5 picks, it's all freshmen and Europeans that no casual fan has ever heard of.

Sunday at The Masters- We are less than a week away, but even if we weren't this would definitely still be on the list. I don't care who's in contention, I'll be watching. Golf is definitely more of an old timer's sport, but if there's one day of the year to watch it's the Sunday of the Masters. CBS and Jim Nantz aren't joking when they say that it's a tradition unlike any other.

The Daytona 500- Maybe I pull this card too much, but I work in sports and I can't tell you who won this race and it happened about a month and a half ago. All I know is that there was a pothole that they had to replace about 37383 times. Also, the only reason that I know that the race takes place in mid-February is because I was in Florida with my family during Winter Break in highschool when Dale Earnhardt died.

The HR Derby- Who won it last year? It's entertaining to watch, but it probably doesn't even deserve to be considered. Speaking of which.....

All-Star Saturday Night in the NBA- You have the 3-point contest and the dunk contest (as well as the Shooting Stars and the Skills Challenge) which are consistenly a let down year after year. Let me know when LeBron decides to participate and then I'll care.

Week 1 of the NFL- A hugely underrated day in sports. This might be a top 3 day for me. Baseball's opening day still takes the cake for the reasons I mentioned above, but I find myself watching pre-season NFL games which means that I'm anxiously waiting for the games to actually count and this is the first day that they do. Also, fantasy football is an enormous industry nowadays and this is the first time that you get to see your team in action. The first day of the college football season is great too, but the fantasy factor gives the NFL the edge.

The presentation of the Heisman trophy- Although I can rattle off the past 20-25 winners, it's usually pretty clear who the winner will be. Also, I prefer the one on one interviews from the NBA/NFL drafts as opposed to the ones Kirk Herbstreit and Chirs Fowler do during the ceremony. And by the way, the winners of the award usually don't pan out in the NFL. See Wuerffel, Danny.

The Men's Lacrosse National Championship Game- This has no business being on this list, but Syracuse basketball lost to Butler and the Bluejays are destined to finish in 5th in the AL East, so the Syracuse lacrosse team is really all I'm hanging on to right now. This event takes place every year on Memorial Day, but it starts at 11 a.m., which is an absolute joke.

The Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Competition- I can't get enough of this event. Not only do the competitors enter like they're WWE wrestlers, but they compete for what is called The Mustard Belt. Also, national pride is on the line as the top dogs (no pun intended) are American (hero) Joey Chestnut and Japan's finest Takeru Kobayashi.


If I had to rank my top 5, I'd go:

1.) Opening Day in Baseball
2.) Selection Sunday
3.) Week 1 of the NFL
4.) Sunday at the Masters
5.) The NBA Draft

Par for the Course

This recent stretch of unseasonably warm temperatures in the past few days has me fired up for Spring. Granted this pocket of warm air will most likely be followed by a few more weeks of sub 32 degree temperatures before it becomes the norm. Clearly my Syracuse upbringing has made me slightly jaded about this unusually warm week. In fact, during my college years I particularly resented the jokers that would wear flip flops and pastel shorts to class during a stretch like this. Call it a minor victory, but this is one of the few reasons that I'm almost happy to be out of college.

My excitement for the Spring is perhaps felt most in my golf boner, which is almost fully erect now. The re-emergence of green grass has made me think of fairways that I surely won't hit. I'm particularly amped for a Spring/Summer full of golf because I purchased some new sticks with my fantasy football winnings (to the 4 females that may read this- don't judge me). A few weeks ago I went to a heated range with my cousin who will not be named (neither here nor on the blog he once wrote for) and let's just say that I have a lot of work to do.

I'm your typical golfer who shoots in the 90s (mainly in the 95-99 range), but dreams of one day consistently shooting in the 80s. My drives go left, my drives go right, I swing about 8000 times too fast, I don't bring my club all the way up on my backswing (or so I'm told), and I have a habit of 3-putting. Basically I'd probably be better off if I closed my eyes on the tees and greens. Even still, I love the game. I've even been fortunate enough to record 2 hole in ones in my day. They occurred exactly one year apart (on July 4th- What can I say? I love America) on a par-3 course close to where I grew up.

Although I've laid out my considerable flaws I believe that they are all fixable. At least I hope they are. As I get older and my hint of athleticism quickly fades into oblivion I will rely on golf to satisfy my athletic desires. If I know what I do wrong, I should be able to fix it, right? Unfortunately this wasn't the case for me when it came to basketball, but that was mostly because there were some athletic hurdles that I simply couldn't overcome.

Each new golf season (just like Spring) brings a new sense of hope with it. Every golfer thinks that they are going to be considerably better than they were the year before. After hardly improving, if at all, in 2009 I've learned that, much to my dismay, I'm never going to wake up and suddenly be a much better golfer. It's one of my favorite leisure activities, but in order to be good I'm going to have to seriously work at it.

Normally around this time I also get excited for the start of the Major League Baseball season. This year though, I hardly have a chubby. For starters, all of my fanhood energy is devoted to the best college basketball team in America. Secondly, the Toronto Bluejays, my favorite MLB team, are poised for another dismal year. In the off season they traded the best pitcher in the game, fired their GM, and decided to rebuild their farm system. This essentially means that they are giving up on this season, even though it hasn't even started (a method that I've become desensitized to as a Knicks fan), and are going back to the drawing board. In fact, the other day on Baseball Tonight ESPN 1050's Andrew Marchand predicted that the Bluejays will have the worst record in the league in 2010. I've even tried to pump myself up for the season by telling people that the Bluejays are vying for 5th place in the AL East (as if it's a good thing) and that no one is going to stop them.

Despite the low expectations for the only big league club north of the border I am still very excited for the Spring, although if the Knicks don't sign anyone of note and my golf game doesn't improve this Spring excitement might quickly turn into Summer bitterness.

El Capitan

For as long as I can remember I have been a Yankee hater. George Steinbrenner and his Evil Empire have been the bane of my existence as a Bluejays fan for the better part of the last 15 years. Case in point, last year (first time I'm saying last year and referencing 2009- it feels a little weird) they won the World Series with former Blue Jay great A.J. Burnett as their number 2 starter. They also had former Blue Jay Rookie of the Year Eric Hinske on their roster, but he's been dead to me ever since his sophomore slump in 2003, during which he hit .243 with just 12 homeruns and 63 RBI's.

Winning with former Blue Jays doesn't even begin to describe the hate in my soul, though. Admittedly my hate has dissipated over the years, but growing up I hated how the Yankees always signed the big name free agents. I hated how they always found a way to come back and win. And I hated how they always made the playoffs. The face of the Yankees for the past 15 years has undoubtedly been Derek Jeter, but despite my hate for the organization I have never hated him. Sure he's overrated defensively and I think that this play is overly dramatic, but like I included in a post a few months ago, Jeter is just hard to hate.

Not only is Jeter hard to hate, he's cool. He is largely regarded as one of the lone brightspots of the so-called "steroids era". In fact, baseball fans have become so desensitized to PEDs (performance enhancing drugs) that they would only be surprised if Jeter or Ken Griffey, Jr. were discovered to be users. Jeter's ability to thrive in the clutch as well has his fistful of rings make him a mortal lock to be enshrined in the Baseball Hall of Fame five years after he plays his last game.

While he'll have to wait the requisite time to be inducted into Cooperstown, he will soon become a member of a more illustrious Hall of Fame. In case you haven't heard, the New York Post has reported that the 35-year old Jeter is set to marry his current girlfriend Minka Kelly (more on her later) on November 5th of this year. If this is in fact true it would put an end to one of the most impressive dating resumes of all time. Seriously, everyone always talks about how Joltin' Joe DiMaggio married Marilyn Monroe, but just take a look at what/who D'Slangin' Derek has done. If this isn't worthy of the Bachelorhood Hall of Fame I don't know what is.


Mariah Carey



Mariah Carey, the 5-time Grammy Award winner, is the only of Jeter's girlfriends that was more famous than him at the time that they dated(right now I'd say they are equally famous). Dating Mariah from '96-'98 may be Jeter's most impressive feat as a bachelor because 1.) She was married to Tommy Mottolla until 1997 and 2.) She was in her (career and sexual) prime and could have had any guy that she wanted (She released her Butterfly album in '97)

By the way, look at Mariah's dating resume. She went from Mottolla (white and 21 years older than her) to Jeter (mulatto and 4 years younger than her) to Nick Cannon (black and 10 years younger than her). P Diddy and/or Mase definitely fucked her during the making of the Honey (Bad Boys Remix) video and she's been working her way towards black guys ever since, right?


Lara Dutta



Dutta, who was born in India, was named Miss Universe in 2000 at the age of 21.

In September of 2009 ESPN.Com's Rick Reilly wrote, "A few years back, Jeter let me open an entire locker full of his mail. The most interesting letter was from a different Miss Universe, who included a photo with not a lot of clothing and her cell number. When I told Jeter -- with astonishment -- that he was being pursued with vigor by a Miss Universe, he said, and I quote exactly: "No way, dude. I'm not going down that Miss Universe road again." I just stared, open-mouthed, at him. Has any man ever uttered that sentence before?"


Jordana Brewster



Jeter dated the soap opera turned Hollywood actress just as she came into the national spotlight for her role in the film The Fast and the Furious (2001).


Adriana Lima



Lima is a Victoria's Secret model who was born in Brazil. She is a devout Catholic that attends church every Sunday. In fact, Lima told GQ in 2006 that she was a virgin and was going to wait until she got married to have sex.

I find it hard to believe that Jeter couldn't snake her v-card, but she has since married former NBA player Marko Jaric and they have a baby girl named Valentina.


Vanessa Minnillo



Long before Nick Lachey came along, Jeter dated the former Miss Teen USA and TRL host. I'm a big fan of Minnillo because she's smoking hot, but still comes across as the girl next door type.


Jessica Alba



Alba is one of the most pre-eminent sex symbols in America (#1 in Maxim's Hot 100 list in 2001, #1 in AskMen.com's 99 Most Desirable Women in 2006) and Jeter, of course, dated her in her prime. Alba is both so hot and known for being so hot that it took me a good 15 seconds to remember that she is an actress.

I thought she was going to be the one to tie Jeter down (they seemed right together), but the two split and she is now married with a child.


Jessica Biel



There was big debate in the 00's about which Jessica, Biel or Alba, was hotter. Go figure Jeter dated them both. Biel first hit it big as the oldest sibling of the Camden family on the WB show 7th Heaven. By the turn of the millenium she knew that she had to branch out from her "goody goody" image to have a lasting career in Hollywood, so what did she do? Although it pissed off her producers at 7th Heaven, she posed for semi-nude photographs for Gear magazine at the age of 17. She has since said that she regrets that decision, but I think it's what skyrocketed her towards super stardom. If she didn't pose for those pictures does she still date Jeter and Justin Timberlake? My guess is no, but then again, I was always in the Alba camp.


Minka Kelly



Jeter has reportedly been dating the Friday Night Lights star since May of 2009 and the two have already been falsely rumored to be engaged.

Even if the rumors are again false, the question still needs to be answered. Where does Minka Kelly rank among Jeter's former flames?

Well first and foremost I'm a huge fan of Friday Night Lights and Minka is unconscionably hot everytime she appears on screen, so I think she's right up there. Next, it's hard to believe, but Minka/Lyla Garrity, is older than both Jessica Alba and Jessica Biel (the youngest of the 3- shocking, I know), but I think this makes her a more compatible match for Jeter. Next, her father is a former guitarist for Aerosmith, which is cool, except for the fact that he abandoned Minka and her mother. Lastly, she may not have the same kind of star power that Jeter's former girlfriends had, but she's entering her prime as an actress and a baby maker and I think Jeter finally wants to settle down.



There are also unsubstantiated rumors that link Jeter to Vida Guerra, Scarlett Johansson, and Gabrielle Union.

Seriously, is anyone else even in Jeter's league? The only other contenders that I can think of are:

Brad Pitt: Gwyneth Paltrow, Jennifer Aniston, Angelina Jolie

Justin Timberlake: Britney Spears, Vanessa Milano, Cameron Diaz, Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Biel

and

John Mayer: Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jessica Simpson, Minka Kelly, Jennifer Aniston

Movember

Today marks the end of Movember, a worldwide celebration of the moustache that aims to raise awareness for health issues that primarily plague men like prostate and testicular cancer. Like most causes, this is a great one (Does anyone ever say, this is a bad cause?). I mean, am I the only one fearful of the day that I have to endure a proctate exam?

Unfortunately my moustache only grows in faintly. It's there, but it's just not at all noticeable. Luckily, I know some people that have a little more going on under the nose and above the lips. So in honor of Movember, here they are:


Matty K




Jimmy Jam




Jess




Pete




Of course, a post about moustaches would not be complete without mentioning former Toronto Bluejays/Syracuse Chiefs great Sal Fasano.



Sal spent his entire big league career as a journeyman backup catcher and left an indellible mark wherever he went. He wasn't much of a hitter, but he worked well with pitchers and was a great guy to have in the clubhouse. In fact, Sal worked so well with pitchers that former closer Tom "Flash" Gordon once said, "There's nobody I'd rather throw to than Sal Fasano."

A few years ago Sal was thinking about retiring, but his third child was born with hypoplastic left heart syndrome (the left side of his heart didn't fully develop) and the medical bills were not cheap. Although his body was quickly deteriorating, he continued playing baseball in order to provide for his family.

"It's often hard to get out of bed ... hard to want to go to the field....My wife is home with the kids, serving as a mother and a father. You can't help but question your sanity. You're driven by one thing -- hope."

He signed a minor league contract with the Bluejays in 2007 knowing that he would need to get called up at some point during the season in order to qualify for the Major League health insurance plan. He spent much of the season in the city of hopes and dreams playing for the Chiefs, but did get called up to play in 16 games for the Jays that year. Sal then rolled the dice again in 2008, this time with the Cleveland Indians, and was fortunate enough to play in 15 games that year for the Tribe.

"We need the coverage. Playing major league baseball is awesome. I love it, I enjoy it. But this is about my family first. About Santo (his son)."

This past season Sal signed a minor league contract with Colorado Rockies, but was never called up to the big leagues. This unfortunately meant that he and his family were stuck with the Minor League health insurance plan, which isn't terrible, but it doesn't cover all of the procedures that may be necessary for his son.

Knowing that his chances of ever making it back to the show were bleak, Sal officially retired and last week was named the manager of the Toronto Bluejays' Single A affiliate: the Lansing Lugnuts (I couldn't make that up if I tried).

Surely, based on his track record of working with pitchers at every level Sal will make a phenomenal manager (most former catchers are). I'd love it if he burst onto the scene like Joe Girardi, but that's probably a bit too much to ask. I'm just happy that the future stars of my favorite baseball franchise will be taught by such a great person.

"When I think of Sal Fasano, I think of greatness. Not of Willie Mays or Ted Williams greatness, but of a uniquely excellent human being who, were class and decency the most valued standards of a career, would be the easiest Hall of Fame inductee of all time." - ESPN.Com's Jeff Pearlman

Top 5 SportsCenter Commercials

First of all, I apologize for the week hiatus, but as many of you know, I have been going through a little bit of a transition in my young career. In order to appease my readers (the five of you that still check this site everyday) I looked at what my buddy Frank in Syracuse has recently written to try to get some sort of material on here. Frank's work has been featured on this blog before; however after reading one of his recent posts, I felt like I could improve upon it. So here are my "Top 5 'This is SportsCenter' commercials."

1.) Rookie Camp


You gotta raise it up

I think what makes this commercial great, aside from Kenny Mayne, is that they picked two of the most arrogant athletes of our generation. For those of you that have forgotten, Keyshawn was the trendsetter to what Stephon Marbury is doing now and if getting paid to stay away from a team and not play doesn't speak enough for his arrogance, I think this might. Kobe's arrogance is a part of his brilliance. Most people associate his arrogance with driving Shaq out of LA and choosing a number that is one digit higher than Michael Jordan's (Kobe wore 24 in highschool. Don't read too much into things). The epitome of his arrogance; however is his relationship, if you could even call it that, with Raja Bell, formerly of the Phoenix Suns. Bell is well known for his defensive prowess and has had some memorable showdowns with Kobe. This video sums it up. Bell, as you should have heard in the video if you click on these links, once called out Kobe's arrogance to which Kobe responded by saying.

"Does he know me? Do I know this guy? I don't know this guy. I might have said one word to this guy. I don't know this kid ... I don't need to know this kid. I don't want to… Maybe he wasn't hugged enough as a kid."

Of course, this commerical now has personal resonance for me because I just completed my own stay in "Rookie Camp."

2.) New Kid



This commerical almost served as a social commentary about highly touted prep basketball players going straight from highschool to the NBA. Every kid in America had dreams of being a SportsCenter anchor and "The Kid" was a pretty accurate representation of what would happen if someone that young was given such an opportunity. I mean, let's be honest, Jimmy Key was riding out his career worse than Julio Franco.

3.) American Cheese


Yeah that's right

For those of you that read Frank's post, and I'll assume that's none of you, he got this one right. Not only do I always request American cheese, but I even ask to get my French Toast Americanized because we don't throw in the white towel like those scrumpet eating Frogs. As embarassing as it is to be a Frenchie, imagine being from a place that used to be a French colony. Canada's only saving grace is the wonderful franchise that is the Toronto Bluejays. Our neighbors to the north do nothing of global relevance and that's not the only thing we blame them for.

4.) Parking Spot



Anyone that's listened to Scott Van Pelt knows that parking at ESPN is very difficult. This commercial is perhaps the most creative of the 'This is Sportscenter' brand. Although Danica has a legititmate gripe in the commercial because of her name, she, as a woman, shouldn't be driving in the first place. Which reminds me of this classic test question.



5.) Captain America



This commericial blends two of the things that I hold near and dear to my heart; Syracuse University's 2003 NCAA Men's National Championship and America. I loved the fact that Carmelo was a captain on Team USA. Along the same lines, The Sports Edge guys once debated which superheroes they would have in their starting five of a basketball team. The only unanimous decision was that Captain America would be the player/coach.

My superhero starting five was
PG- The Flash
SG- Captain America
SF- Superman
PF- The Hulk
C- Mr. Fantastic (of the Fantastic Four that can stretch his body into incredible lengths)