Trick or Treat

I worked 28 of the 31 days in October, so I haven't really had the appropriate amount of time to let a thought or two really germinate and become a full blog post. Instead I'll just spout off on a myriad of topics that have crossed my mind in the past month.

My parents routinely ask me what my friends do for a living. In most cases I genuinely don't know the answer. Maybe it's because I don't know what my friends actually do at work because I don't know how things operate in their industry (finance, for example) or maybe I just don't care. That might sound horrible and I'm sure my parents are skeptical about my lack of knowledge when it comes to the professions of my friends. I think that the go to question for adults my parents age has always been, "What do you do?" More than likely it's the first thing that an adult will ask another upon being introduced. I guess my question is this. Does a person's profession reveal anything significant about their character? I would argue that it doesn't. I don't know what the majority of my friends do for a living, but that doesn't mean that we aren't close. Their day to day tasks and duties have little bearing on the type of person that they are. I'm more interested in where they're living, who they're hanging out with, what they've recently posted on a social media site, and what movies, tv shows, and books they've recently consumed.

* I recently made a serious attempt at guessing what the other 9 members of a fantasy football league do. I got one correct (my cousin who will not be named) and another partially right (a lawyer, but I don't have a clue what he does).


Sunday Night Football's open on NBC is different this year. Country star Carrie Underwood has replaced country star Faith Hill. From what I can tell the lyrics to the song, "Waiting All Day For Sunday Night" have not changed (they still rhyme NBC with NBC in the last stanza), but the video has. Underwood is younger (30), more attractive, and more vibrant than Hill (46). In fact, Underwood might be in my top 5 of celebrities that I want to bang. That all said, I much prefer the Faith Hill version of the Sunday Night Football open, which, by the way, is the greatest thing going in terms of sports television.

Faith showed her legs (she changed outfits from year to year- sometimes within the same version), worked her hips, and there was that one brief moment every week where you thought you could see her vagina. She got every drip of sex appeal ringing through her body and put it into that performance. I used to get a little tingly before the big game every week. Underwood just looks bubbly and fun. She jumps around and claps her hands. It's like she knows that she's beautiful, so she doesn't exert much effort. I love Underwood, but I'd be all for bringing back Faith.


The NBA is back and I, for one, couldn't be more thrilled. I'm a big Knicks fan, but I've really tempered my expectations for the season. Last year they won their division and finished 2nd in the Eastern Conference. I'd be stunned if they managed to do that this year. I actually like their depth a lot. Andrea Bargniani is soft, but he's 7 feet tall and can shoot, Tim Hardaway, Jr. has some spring in his step and he can knock down three-pointers, Metta World Peace actually plays defense and can hit a corner jump shot, and JR Smith won the 6th Man of the Year award last season. I also think that Iman Shumpert is going to have a semi-breakout year (his biggest issue is consistency).

The reason that the Knicks probably won't be the #2 seed again is that the top of the Eastern Conference has gotten significantly better. The Heat, last year's #1 seed, are obviously better than the Knicks. The Bulls swept the Knicks in the regular season last year and now they have former MVP Derrick Rose back. The Pacers beat the Knicks in the playoffs and they get Danny Granger back, added Luis Scola and CJ Watson, and their star Paul George is only getting better. The Nets added future Hall of Famers Paul Pierce and Kevin Garnett and are the clear favorites to win the Atlantic Division. That puts the Knicks at the #5 seed and that doesn't even account for a team like Washington that should be drastically improved from a season ago with the health of John Wall, development of Bradley Beal, and the addition of Marcin Gortat.

I'll probably watch upwards of 60 Knick games this year, but I also watch plenty of other games as well. Here's my starting five of non-All-Stars that I enjoy watching.

PG- Jarrett Jack, Cleveland Cavaliers
SG- Jimmy Butler, Chicago Bulls
SF- Kawhi Leonard, San Antonio Spurs
PF- DeMarcus Cousins, Sacramento Kings
C- Larry Sanders, Milwaukee Bucks

While we're talking NBA, how about the debut of my guy Michael Carter-Williams?



The Sixers are expected to be the worst team in the league (over/under on wins is 16.5) and all they did in their season opener was beat the two-time defending champion Heat thanks to the performance of Carter-Williams. He scored 22 points, dished out 12 assists, set an NBA record with 9 steals in his debut, and also grabbed 7 rebounds.


Since it's Halloween we can end there. I'm going/went as Bradley Cooper's character in Silver Linings Playbook. It's relatively creative (most people should know what I am) and incredibly easy to pull off (grey sweatpants, a grey hoodie, and a black trash bag).

Here are my Top 10 Favorite Candy Options

1.) Twix (THEY'RE ALL TWIX. IT WAS A SET UP. A SET UP I TELL YOU.)
2.) Charleston Chew
3.) Reese's Pieces
4.) Kit Kats
5.) Milky Way
6.) Snickers
7.) Baby Ruth
8.) 100 Grand
9.) 3 Musketeers
10.) Junior Mints

Tool or No Tool

This Monday The Dan LeBatard Show debuted on ESPN Radio (4-7pm ET). LeBatard has long been a well known member of the sports media (he hosts a TV show with his father weekdays on ESPN), but until Monday I had never heard him host a radio show. He’s wildly eccentric, self-deprecating, and apt to go off on tangents, but I’m already a big fan. In one of the first segments I heard he and his co-host who goes by the name Stugotz played a game with Miami Dolphins quarterback Ryan Tannehill. It was called Tool or No Tool. LeBatard and Stugotz rattled off a bunch of things that people say and do and Tannehill had to decide if the performer of the act in question was a tool or not a tool. I’ve borrowed a bunch of theirs and added a few of my own below.

The game reminded me of when I first started working at ESPN. A high school friend asked me if Josh Elliot, at that time an anchor of the 10am SportsCenter, was cocky cool or cocky tool. I had never heard the term before, but immediately knew what it meant. With that said, let’s start Tool or No Tool there.

Josh Elliot (who now works for ABC on Good Morning America)? No tool. There’s an air of smugness about him, but I think he’s a cool dude.

Asking for a re-tweet? Tool. I will never understand this. Even if a celebrity is dumb enough to re-tweet you all that their followers will see if how pathetic you are by asking for a re-tweet.

Wearing jeans and sandals? Tool. Unless you’re a country singer.

Selfies? Tool. I’ve never stooped that low, but my cousin who will not be named has incorporated selfies into his life in an interesting way. He uses them as stakes for bets. For example, we have a bet about whether or not I can eat two pizzas from a particular restaurant in one sitting (I definitely can) and the loser has to post a selfie on Instagram. The winner gets to write the caption.

Ordering a salad at a restaurant? No tool. Had you asked me a year ago my answer probably would have been different, but in today’s day and age this is definitely a legitimate move (even if you’re with a group of guys).

Making jokes about the government shutdown? Tool. They’ve been incessant since it began.

Tweeting about things that happen on Jeopardy? Tool. Guilty as charged, but I still contend that there’s always a contestant who thinks that they are awesome at the categories in which a word or a few letters are in quotes.

Watching Jeopardy? No tool. I actually watched an entire episode while at work this week with my headphones on.

Buffalo Bills backup quarterback Jeff Tuel? Tool.

Posting a picture of your car on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram for any reason? Tool. I got a new car on Monday and have been fighting the slight urge ever since, but I can’t see any positives to doing so.

Having a go-to order at Starbucks? Tool. Grande skinny vanilla latte. I disgust myself.

Growing a playoff beard for the Major League Baseball post season? Tool. This is a hockey thing. Any other attempt pales in comparison. That said, I did shave today in preparation to work every day for the next month on the Major League Baseball post season.

Twitter arguments? Tool. I’ve never done it, but I’m usually quite entertained when two celebrities get into it in the social space (unless it’s the made up feud between Kevin Durant and Dwyane Wade).

British accents? No tool. I’m all about them. I also marvel at the way that British actors develop an American accent. In a related note, Daniel Radcliffe (better known as Harry Potter) was a guest on The Colbert Report last night and was hysterical.

Listening to podcasts? No tool. They are actually pretty good for long runs/workouts. There are also so many of them that it’s hard to not find a topic that interests you.

Strikingly Similar

When it comes to technological advances I'm a bit of a laggard. I had a flip phone all throughout college. In fact, I didn't enter the world of smartphones until December of 2010. I got my first iphone within the past 12 months. I staunchly refused to join Twitter, thinking it was trivial, for years before realizing that if you're not on Twitter you're falling behind. I have only recently joined Instagram and Snap Chat. I adamantly refuse to buy a nook/kindle. I enjoy the experience of going to a bookstore and browsing for new titles. In most instances I know deep down that I'll eventually cave, but I don't think that's the case with reading off of a screen. I like holding the book and feeling how pages I've read and need to read to finish each passing novel.

I tell you this because a thought dawned on me as I was recently reading one of the three magazines that I subscribe to (New York magazine in this case. The other two are Rolling Stone and Maxim). I was reading an article about the new Leonardo DiCaprio/Martin Scorsese movie The Wolf of Wall Street and it dawned on me that two of my favorite celebrities, DiCaprio and Kobe Bryant, have had strikingly similar careers.

DiCaprio is arguably the best actor of his generation. He took the torch from Tom Hanks/Tom Cruise in the mid to late 90s and has been a critically acclaimed box office draw ever since. There have been other elite actors in that time frame (notably Sean Penn, Denzel Washington, Matt Damon, Johnny Depp, Brad Pitt, and George Clooney), but no one has clearly risen above Leo. You could make the case that some have had better careers, but there is no consensus.

Kobe Bryant is the 2nd best shooting guard in NBA history and I don't think there's much debate about that. Bryant idolized Michael Jordan growing up and was eager to follow in his footsteps. It didn't happen over night, but Kobe has been the best NBA player in the post-Jordan era. Sure there were other great players (Tim Duncan, Allen Iverson, Shaquille O'Neal, Kevin Garnett, Steve Nash, and Jason Kidd), but Bryant's accolades are far superior to most others. It should be noted, however, that LeBron James has usurped Kobe's title as the greatest basketball player on the planet.

The two megastars (they have world wide recognition) are both in their mid to late 30s (Leo is 38, Kobe is 35), but we knew them as teens. DiCaprio was a child actor (appeared in Growing Pains) who got his big break on the silverscreen at age 19 in 1993's What's Eating Gilbert Grape. He earned a Best Supporting Actor Oscar nomination for his portrayal of a teenager with a mental disease. He then burst onto the scene as the male lead in James Cameron's 1997 epic Titanic. Kobe was not the first highschool basketball player to jump straight to the NBA, but he was one the most well known and covered at the time of his ascent. Case in point, we all know that Kobe took Brandy to his prom. Less than a year later Kobe was a high flying rookie who won the 1997 Slam Dunk contest.

Leo's individual career is, admittedly, not as impressive as his reputation would suggest. He has not yet won Best Actor in a Leading Role Oscar, the ultimate honor in acting. In fact, he's only been nominated for it twice (The Aviator in 2004 and Blood Diamond 2006). I would argue that he should have at least garnered a nomination for The Departed (2006), but the studio (Warner Bros.) instead pushed for his role in Blood Diamond to be rewarded. He also should have received Best Supporting Actor nominations for his work in Gangs of New York (2002) and Django Unchained (2012). I do think that he'll eventually win the Best Actor Oscar as almost a career achievement sort of way. Similar to how Kate Winslet won Best Actrees in 2009 for her role in The Reader, which was probably her 4th or 5th best performance all time.

Similar to how Leo has been snubbed by the Academy, Kobe was snubbed for years when it came to the MVP award. He's finished in the Top 5 ten times, but only once (2008) did he come away as the winner. For example, Steve Nash won in 2006 by averaging nearly 19 points and more than 10 assists per game. Kobe led the league in scoring (35.4), hauled in more than 5 boards a game, and dished out 4.5 assists to the likes of Smush Parker, Kwame Brown, and Chris Mihm.

While Kobe only has one MVP award, he does have five championships. The acting equivalent would be being cast in a film that wins Best Picture at the Academy Awards. DiCaprio has been a part of two Best Picture wins (Titanic, The Departed) and has "been to the finals" (been in a movie that was nominated for the grand prize) four other times (Gangs of New York, The Aviator, Inception, Django Unchained).

What this tells us is that Leo and Kobe are great individual talents that have been a part of some really good teams. In fact, it's clear to see that they're both at their best when they're surrounded by other elite players/actors. Kobe was at his best playing with Shaq and has won two titles with Pau Gasol as the Robin to his Batman. DiCaprio has thrived alongside Kate Winslet (Titanic), Daniel Day-Lewis (Gangs of New York), Tom Hanks (Catch Me If You Can), Matt Damon/Jack Nicholson (The Departed), and Jaime Foxx/Christolph Walz (Django Unchained).

Not only have they had great teammates, they've also had great coaches. For Kobe it was Phil Jackson. He of the 11 championship rings and unquestionable pedigree. For Leo it was (and continues to be) Martin Scorsese. The two have now teamed up for five successful films (Gangs of New York, The Aviator, The Departed, Shutter Island, and The Wolf of Wall Street).



It's no secret that DiCaprio and Bryant are among the best of all time in their respective fields. It's just striking how similar their career paths have been. Bryant is well ahead in terms of cementing his legacy, but DiCaprio has 30-40 more years to add to his acting career if he so chooses. We don't see such sustained success in sports or acting anymore these days. The two elite performers, who both have LA ties (DiCaprio was borned/raised there, Kobe plays there) are truly titans of their industries.

It's Pat

In the past 2-3 weeks I've spoken with an inordinate amount of people with androgynous names. It's one of those things that you would never notice because so many of these particular names have woven their way into our social fabric. I think it's interesting how many given names can go both ways. I have no meaningful commentary on this subject because I'm not even sure that it says anything about our society.

Instead I've listed as many such names as I could think of and then gave a famous male and female example of each. I'm sure that I forgot a bunch.


Androgynous Names- Male example/Female example

Jamie- Jamie Moyer (former MLB pitcher)/Jamie Lee Curtis (actress)

Pat- Pat Sajak (host of Wheel of Fortune)/Pat Benatar (80s singer)

Quinn- Quinn Cook (Duke point guard)/Quinn Fabray (fictional character from Glee)

Blake- Blake Shelton (country singer)/Blake Lively (actress)

Taylor- Taylor Mays (Cincinnati Bengals safety)/Taylor Swift (singer/songwriter)

Chris- Chris Davis (Baltimore Orioles first baseman)/Chris Evert (retired tennis player)

Christine- Christine Michael (Seattle Seahawks running back)/Christine Quinn (NYC mayoral candidate)

Tori- Torii Hunter (Detroit Tigers outfielder)/Tori Spelling (actress)

Tracy- Tracy Mcgrady (former NBA guard/forward)/Tracy Chapman (singer)

Courtney- Courtney Upshaw (Baltimore Ravens linebacker)/ Courtney Cox (actress)

Leslie- Leslie Frazier (Minnesota Vikings head coach)/ Leslie Mann (actress)

Andy- Andy Warhol (artist)/Andie McDowell (actress)

Morgan- Morgan Freeman (actor)/Morgan Fairchild (actress)

Jesse- Jesse Palmer (ESPN CFB Analyst)/Jessie Spano (fictional character from Saved By the Bell)

Jordan- Jordan Cameron (Cleveland Browns tight end)/Jordin Sparks (singer/actress)

Casey- Casey Affleck (actor)/Casey Anthony (suspected murderer)

Sam- Sam Snead (one of the greatest golfers of all time)/Sam Ponder (ESPN Sideline Reporter)

Drew- Drew Bledsoe (former NFL quarterback)/Drew Barrymore (actress)

Kim- Kim Jong-il (former North Korean dictator)/Kim Carnes (80s singer)

Alex- Alex Rodriguez (New York Yankees third baseman)/Alex Morgan (US soccer player)

Whitney- Whitney Mercilus (Houston Texans linebacker)/Whitney Cummings (comedian/actress)

Shannon- Shannon Sharpe (NFL Hall of Fame tight end)/Shannon Elizabeth (actress)

Frances- Frances Scott Fitzgerald (famous author)/Frances McDormand (actress)

Kelly- Kelly Slater (pro surfer)/Kelly Clarkson (singer)

Rory- Rory McIlroy (golfer)/Rory Gilmore (fictional character from Gilmore Girls)

Shelley- Shelley Duncan (professional baseball player- currently in the minor league)/Shelley Long (actress)

Peyton- Peyton Manning (Denver Broncos quarterback)/Peyton Sawyer (fictional character from One Tree Hill)

Erin- Erin Henderson (Minnesota Vikings linebacker)/Erin Andrews (Fox Sports studio host/sideline reporter)

Brook- Brook Lopez (Brooklyn Nets center)/Brooke Burke (former model/television host)

Robin- Robin Thicke (singer)/Robin Wright (actress)

 

 

Bonus Names

 

I thought of six more surefire androgynous names, but couldn't find a famous female to use as an example. Instead I will try to explain why I'm convinced that they belong to be listed.

Logan- Logan Thomas (Virginia Tech quarterback)/I went to college with a girl named Logan. I always knew of her, but would not have been able to pick her out of a police lineup. In December a bunch of former Fairfield Stags went to Philly to see our friend's band. Sure enough this Logan girl was there. She came right up to me (and a few others who weren't entirely sure who she was) and said hello like we were old friends. She was friendly and fun.

Cory- Cory Booker (mayor of Newark)/My high school friend once dated a girl named Kori, so on that alone I'm going to count it. Cory/Corey both ranked in the top 800 female names in the 1980s.

Sidney- Sidney Crosby (Pittsburgh Penguins center)/Sidney was a top 260 female name in the late 1980s and Sydney was the 78th most common female name in 2012.

Madison- Madison Bumgarner (San Francisco Giants pitcher)/Madison was the 9th most popular female name in 2012 (#2 in 2001 and 2002).

Devon- Devon White (former MLB outfielder)/My friend's sister-in-law is named Devon (not positive on the spelling). Devon was the 225th most popular female name in 1990.

Angel- Angel Cabrera (golfer)/There have to be thousands of strippers named Angel, right? As it turns out Angel has been a very popular name for boys and girls since the 1970s. In 2012 Angel was the 227th most popular name for females (#57 for boys).

 

Names that I initially did not think of, but came across while researching this post

 

Mackenzie

Addison

Bailey (more of a dog's name though, right?)

Hayden

Riley

Stop Me If You've...

A week and a half ago I encountered what I thought was an uncomfortable social situation. I didn't like how I handled it, so I turned to my buddy Browny to assess the scenario. Our email exchange went as follows...

Sir,
 

First and foremost, congratulations on your wedding. It was an amazing weekend. You and Katie are awesome. How was Port St. Lucia?

 

I have a social etiquette question for you...

 

Friday morning I'm well into a run at about 9am when I hear a car beep at me. Instinctively, I turn and look at the car that's going the same direction that I am and I don't recognize the vehicle or the two middle aged women in it. The woman in the passenger seat has her window down and motions towards me. I stop, take off my headphones, and look her way. She asks if I know where _________ Street is. I don't and tell her that as I put my headphones back on and continue my run. The same car then stops 40 feet later and asks a man who was watering his lawn.

Is it within the bounds of proper protocal to stop someone that's wearing headphones and running to ask for directions? I get the assumption that if someone is running they're probably familiar with the area, but isn't asking them to stop a major inconvenience? Someone walking or out in their front lawn makes sense (I wouldn't stop someone mowing their lawn, though). By the way, in today's smartphone world, who stops anyone for directions anymore?

Would love your thoughts,

Noon


Hello Sir,

St. Lucia was wonderful and if I didn't live in the greatest city in the world it would have been very hard to leave.

In regards to your social etiquette question I must say that this a topic that is very prevalent in my home life. Not because I am a runner but the wife is an avid runner. She will never stop a run to address someone in a car or walking by. Even if she knows the person she may quickly yell "hello, sorry I am training and can't stop."

Mowing the lawn is my business and I hate when neighbors see me out mowing and decide to come over and chat me up. It's hard enough to get it going the first time and even worse to stop it and do it a second time after our pointless conversation.

I understand people's desperation to figure out where they are going especially if they are running late but it is not acceptable to interrupt people while they are doing there own work and especially people who are running. I would never expect someone who is running to just put their workout on hold to give me directions. That is unacceptable on that women's part. Like you said, get a GPS.


Obviously the two of us are on the same page, so case closed. That said, when is it socially acceptable to ask someone for directions? Rarely because people should just use their smartphones, but here are three categories for those without the internet at their fingertips.

You can ask the following people without any hesitation: a gas station attendant, a crossing guard, Siri, a person (or couple) walking, someone in the car next to you with their window down, the mailman, or a police officer.

It's a little dicier to ask the next group, but I'd allow it: someone watering flowers or otherwise gardening, someone raking leaves or shoveling snow, someone in the car next to you with their window up, someone walking with a stroller, a toll booth collector (depending on the length and speed of the line), or a construction worker.

You should not ask people in this last group: runners, bicyclists, people mowing their lawn, or children.

Let the record show that on my run yesterday a man in a car yelled "Hey!" to me and motioned for me to come towards him (presumably to ask for directions) and my initial instinct was to stop, but, with the previous email exchange in mind, I made a hand gesture (not the finger) and kept on going.

Friendship

This past weekend one of my closest friends from high school got married. Browny, as he will henceforth be referred to as, was the second of our group to get hitched (the first is actually a father already). Lucky number three will take place next month.

As the weekend’s festivities progressed I got to thinking about my relationship with my oldest friends. I hardly keep in touch with any of them (guys don’t do the day to day upkeep like girls, especially when there’s a 250 mile barrier involved), but of course that goes both ways. We used to joke that we weren’t really friends at all, just drinking buddies. I have said on numerous occasions that if you took professional and high level collegiate sports out of the picture I definitely wouldn’t be friends with a few of my high school friends. What I realized this weekend is that these relationships, although they’ve admittedly faded, are, in fact, rock solid.

I’ve recently posited that one’s college friends are more genuine in the sense that you get to choose from a larger pool. In high school your friends are your friends because you live close to one another (not the case for private school kids like me, but I’m talking in generalities). Your options are very limited. College is a four year weeding out process where kids wind up with friends that are usually the most similar to them. Sure, many college friendships happen because kids lived on the same floor freshman year, but many of those proximity based connections dissolve before graduation. High school friendships are also largely proximity based, but they’re harder to separate from. Plus, the area that you bond over is your hometown. That connection is as strong as they come. Every time you think of home (a place both parties presumably love) you’ll most likely think of times spent with these home town friends.

What gives high school friendships the leg up is that these people have known you longer and have seen you at your best and at your worst as you’ve gone from an awkward teenager to a mature adult. They grew up with you and experienced many of the same trials and tribulations along the way. This knowledge base allows them to understand you better than almost anyone else. College friends met up with you a few years into your journey- after you had conquered some hurdles. That’s not to say that college friendships can’t be closer than those formed in high school (they can). It’s just that it’s less common. I’ve recently been asking people (cousins, friends, co-workers, acquaintances) who they are closer with- their high school friends or their college friends. So far, roughly 80% have said that they consider themselves to be closer with their high school friends. I don’t know which way I’d lean, but this weekend re-affirmed the strong ties that I’ll always have with my friends back home.

The relationship that I examined the most while I was back in the Syracuse area was the one I have with Browny. This makes sense. After all, he was the one who got married. We met in 7th grade as members of the modified football team and have been friends ever since. When I think of our friendship the following stories/themes come to mind.

- Whenever I’m at a restaurant and someone mentions that they don’t know what to order I launch right into the following Browny story. Browny, our friend Hermo, and I were drinking at Browny’s apartment one day in the Summer of 2008. We decided to get dinner at a local watering hole known as the Blarney Stone. I had never eaten there before, so as we approached the counter to place our orders I mentioned how I didn’t know what to get.

Browny, perhaps sensing the “please help me” tone in my voice, said, “What do you get at Pizza Hut?”

“Pizza.”

He continued, “What do you get at Wings?”

Sensing a theme I replied, “Wings.”

“What do you get when you go to Tully’s?”

“The Tully Tenders.”

“What do you get when you go to the Blarney Stone?”

Stumped (and hammered) I answered, “I don’t know. That’s why I’m asking you.”

“You get the Blarney burger!”

The lesson here, kids, is that if you’re ever unsure about what to get go with the item on the menu that incorporates the name of the restaurant.

- Devoted readers of the blog (are there any?) may remember that Browny is the friend of mine who shares my devotion to and understanding of social etiquette. He is the one I turn to when I don’t know how to act in a given situation. We regularly critique how each of us handled a particularly dicey scenario. The most recent social etiquette question that I wrote about took place just under two years ago and can be found here.

- Browny was the person to know at the bar for the better part of the last decade. He routinely spent in excess of $300 just to make sure that all of his friends were having a good time. On my 21st birthday he bought a round for the entire bar…and then another one for everyone except for me (dubbed the “fuck the birthday boy” shot). His generosity extended well beyond the bar scene. He does things and buys things for others and expects nothing in return. It’s really amazing to behold. In life there are givers, takers, and matchers. Givers give, takers take, and matches give only to get something back in return. Browny is a giver.

I am not; however in college a friend once told me how they loved how I always bought the first round whenever we got to bar. This was almost certainly a result of my dealings with Browny. If I didn’t get him a drink right from the start there was no way that he’d allow me to get him one later.

- Browny is an incredible athlete. He played football and basketball in high school and was very good in both. He may not have been the star of either team, but he was definitely one of the hardest workers. He was one of those heady basketball players that always made the right pass, only took shots when he was supposed to, and hustled his ass off. He did all of the little things to make the team go. Whenever I play pickup basketball with him I feel pressure to live up to his expectations. If I don’t go all out or if I turn the ball over (a frequent occurrence) a simple look from Browny is all I need to know that I have to play harder and smarter. His glares of disappointment make me want to be better. I may not have the skills to do so, but I can certainly give more effort and minimize my mistakes.

- Not only is Browny an incredible athlete, he’s also an incredible teammate in lawn, table, and board games. Over the years we have been partners in numerous games (corn hole, beer pong, Guesstures, KanJam, etc.) and have fared rather well. Whenever strategy was involved (for example- if one of us wanted to shoot at a lone cup in beer pong) and we disagreed about what to do, all the person shooting/playing/tossing had to say was “faith in a friend” and the other backed off and put their trust in the other. Over time this phrase has transcended lawn, table, and board games. Nowadays it’s more of a way to acknowledge their concern about something, but to reassure them that we know what we’re doing.

- Another phrase that helps define my friendship with Browny comes from the Kid Rock song “All Summer Long”. The lyric, which I just learned is on Browny’s Instagram profile, is “It’s the simple things in life like when and where.” Shortly after this song was released we commented on how this phrase sums up many of the friendships that we have with kids from high school. All we need to say is when and where and our friends will be there at the drop of a hat. Texts like “Browns at 7”, “I’m having some drinks at my house around 8”, or “At Suds” were and continue to be common occurrences.

- Browny once said, “I have enough friends. I don’t need anymore,” with such conviction that it made me really digest his words. Too often people want everyone to like them. They go out of their way to placate to the personalities of others. I actually think doing so is my greatest skill in life (making others think that I like them), but it shouldn’t be done simply to make others like you. Browny’s message, whether he knew it or not, was that he’s completely comfortable in his own skin (and he is). He’s going to be who he is and if you don’t like it then it won’t bother him. He has enough people in his life that appreciate him for his true self and that’s all he needs. Now he’s found his better half and I wish the two of them nothing but the best.

Vacation

For the past three days I have been having the same conversation.

Co-worker: Hey Dan/Stanczyk, how was vacation?
Me: Very relaxing, thanks.
Co-worker: Where’d you go again?
Me: New Hampshire, on a lake.
Co-worker: Cool, what’d you do?
Me: Oh, you know…took things easy. Didn’t think about sports for a week. Sort of re-charged the battery, so to speak.

People aren’t really interested in what others do while on vacation. They just ask to be polite. If someone really wanted to know what I did during my week in New Hampshire I would tell them this.

I did not have access to television, the internet or air conditioning. I did not drive a car, but I was a passenger in three different boats. I ran 28 miles, but still managed to pack on over 3 pounds (that's what eating three helpings of breakfast, dessert after lunch and dinner, and drinking two cups of coffee a day will do). I woke up before 8am every morning, played two tennis matches (one singles, one doubles- both wins), two games of horse shoes (doubles- both losses), shuffleboard, softball, two truths and a lie, four square, and Bingo. I drank whiskey, gin, rum, sangria, and beer. I read three books (two of which included the word imbroglio), wore a candy necklace, gave something of a eulogy, and donned a tie-dye shirt. I threw a baseball 66 miles per hour, watched my father shoot a 79 and miss a hole in one by a centimeter (I had a 94), and served as a softball instructor for my sisters. I showered only twice, but went swimming in a lake every day except Thursday and somehow managed to contract swimmer's ear (or at least that's what I think it is). I used a flashlight every night, danced for hours at a time on multiple evenings, and fought a member of the Army and my 6’4 cousin on a wooden log in the middle of the lake at 12:30am one night. I read a poem aloud, gambled my father’s money away (it was only $3 for a game of LCR. If you don’t know what that is that’s a you problem), and was a part of a group that successfully pulled of a rope trick.